chapter 4
...inner voice...
She was numb when these words dawned meaning in her... her tears started from nowhere and flowed down...she looked at him in rage anger.. helplessness... disgust covering the tinge of love that urged to peep out...
she surely broke down like anything hearing it... from him!!!
he said this... its true he do mean what he says and he is angry now which mean those words are not less than fact of future...she know that...aftral she know him...closely...
its been half an hour he left the room still she is in the floor...not moved a single inch...tears flowing down without her acknowledgement...ofcourse with arnav around her...
she never had control over any of her emotions or actions... he rule her... he did rule her in every way....her emotions...her thoughts...her soul..her body...her reactions...her actions...her anger...her love...her passion...her eagerness...her anxiety...her tears...her embrasment...her every single movement...
god knws why is like that she turns to be hypnotised wenever he is around her... even then...even now.... but today it was heights...he did say her what is coming for her openly... well she knew this is coming for her but she never expected this kind of tauntrum...especially from him...
gone are the days..where he felt her precious...
gone those days ..where he looked up to her loyaly...
gone are those days...where he was protective over her...
gone are those days ... where he liked her over anybody...
gone are those days...where he gave her all her dignity...
gone...its gone...she lost it...
or to say she lost it being hasty...she just did what felt right for that instance... but its not that all we see...we hear...we think... is RIGHT at all instance...
*****************
same tym...
arnav stormed out of the room at once he met her eyes aftr uttering those wrds...
gosh what the hell was that... he did mean to hurt her...to mock her...to show her the place...
to prick her at the spot...to warn her he is coming...to let her know how horrible the truth is...to make her aware its not so easy as she thought...
"Just to remind u that u will no more be PURE...INNOCENT...UNTOUCHED..."
His own words lingered in his ears and he felt tortured with it... he just uttered it to make her beliv she means nothing to him but its not the reality... he paced here and there in his study room and fell on the couch to relax sometime but as always her memories took charge over his senses...
***flashback***
HP stepped in to give those bunch of lilies wich kushi left behind in the mess payal created..arnav tuk those flowers in his hands... hp went out... he felt those flowers... brought them close to his face and felt them...
Yes they are soft... seems innocent... pure... JUST LIKE HER... her mom is right...
He stared at those flowers for no particular reason...he smiled occasionaly remembering her...
Life hav never been colorful to him...never been lively to him...
He did enjoy himself...he did hav fun..he did breath...he did live... but there were never such moment wich he would love to remember and cherish... she gave such moment to him...and this is the first tym he looked up for a girl's true beauty apart from flirting and having fun...
He felt so gud for the first tym in life... he felt like to hold her hand and spend tym... he wished tat travel last forever...
that last glance of her... he closed his eyes...it is still fresh in him though she left hours back... he smiled closing his eyes visualising her... hw cute she looked when she was scolding me to me itself... he chuckled out and opened his eyes... he eyed those lilies again...
'popcorn' he pronounced it once but.. it dint feel as sweet as how it sounded when she said it... those cute eyes carried a innocent anger...as if a child been denied for its fav icecream...
Wait... wht i just thought!!?? Her eyes wer innocent... he laughed... frm wen did i strted to notice details on a girl... gosh she is crazy and i think that craziness got struck to me too... he shaked his head and got up to freshen...
He entered his bathroom for a warm bath.. all he could see is her face...her charm...her smile... when he tried to ease himself closing his eyes under the shower those glimse of her made that warm shower grow cold and chill for him to shiver and shudder in her thoughts... her memories...
He came out...he took the comb and before he could comb he just shaked his head to get rid of those dripping water droplets... those droplets when they realised they lost his proximity scattered to jump on those lilies... maybe those droplets might hav known that he will surely take those lilies in his hands so that they can reach him again...
As if he heard those droplets speak...his eyes turned around to fix on those lilies which is now adorned with fresh droplets which he offered ofcourse...!!
They seemed beautiful..those droplets let out glare as they shattered the moonlight that fell on them through the french doors...!!
He for a second imagined kushi in those lilies place...how will she look if he shakes his drenched hair on her face... she too wil look like those flowers...his heart seemed to hav registered kushi's mom perspective deep within it that it never left a single opportunity to compare those lilies with kushi...!!!
He came to those flowers and took them... he touched them softly and went out to the poolside to drop them in the pool water in a thought that they may get tired without water... he kneeled down and placed them softly in the water one by one... and then ran his fingers in the water..made circles... took some water with his bare hands to pour on a lily... that flower danced for stability when water is spilled on its petals... he smiled seeing that elegant graceful movement of lily...!!
He came out to call HP... aftr seeing its beauty he is not ready to see his poolside naked and dry without those lilies henceforth...
Arnav : HP...HP come here...
*********
HP : arnav bhaiyaa...
Arnav brought himself out of those memories forcefully as he heard HP calling ou for him...
Arnav : hmm... what?
HP: dinner is ready... shal i serve it for u in the table?
Arnav : hmm no im not hungry...wil eat later...
HP: ok bhaiyaa... he turned to leav..
Arnav : stop...ermm did she eat something? I knw she wouldnt hv... he mumbled thoughtfully to himself... then looked at HP... do one thing serve her dinner in my room itself and ask her to eat... tell her that i insisted.. go...
***** arnav's room...
Kushi was now lying in the bed...tears dried on her milky cheeks...she was blankly starring at those lilies from inside through the french doors...
Knock..knock...
HP: woh... arnav bhaiyaa asked u to eat... here ur dinner... he placed the tray and seeing no response from her went out... he did feel bad for this girl...she seemed pale...so pale and tired...
Why wouldnt she...she have not taken anything excpt that glass of juice for the whole day...
HP informed the state of kushi and also said that she dint eat...
saying so HP left... arnav in study battling whether to move to her or not...kushi in his room battling to understand what is going on with her...around her...
both sinked deep with their inner voices being apart in different rooms...
He was angry that she dint obey him...
...she was angry that he made him go through this...
He felt to storm in and force her to eat...
...she felt like to storm out and throw away the plate on his face...
he thought why should i care for her dinner...
...she questioned herself is my dinner so important to him...
He thought he was wrong to taunt her...the next instance..
...she thought what wrong did she do to suffer this...
He felt his heart melting for her...
...she felt like to open up to him...
He felt like to go to her...
...she felt like to run into his arms...
He felt like to take her in his arms to protect her for eternity...
...she was struggling to erase out her inner conflicts...
He was trying hard to suppress his growing concern for her...
...she felt weak...
He felt vulnerable seeing her getting weak...
...she wished all this to be a dream..
He thought to return her back all her dreams...
...she wanted to confront...
He wanted to confess...
...she fell back to hide herself in pillows
He dropped himself back to couch...
...she closed her eyes tight...
He hit his head to rest on couch...
...his gestures...his care..his smile...their moments... that girl... that sight...her words... those evidences...his betrayal...those frightful nights...that pain...that helplessness... she shuddered when those memories hit her hard on heart once again...!!!
Her charm...her innocense...her care...her gestures...her kindness..their moments...that day...those glares... that slap...that insult... that defame... those laughs... those mourning nights... those sleepless moments... he groaned when those memories freshened his wound once again...!!!
...she composed herself to sit back...
He raised himself not to fall again for her...
...she decided to go through this..
He decided to finish her off...
...he dont deserve my tears...
She dont deserve my softness...
...im not letting him to feel me weak...
Im not letting her rule my senses...
...she wiped off her tears..
He wiped off his face...
...she wanted to end this inner conflicts...
He wanted to get rid of this turmoil...
...both determined to live this 3 months standing firm on one another's will..!!! both decided to mask their inner voices for sometime for their own reasons...
She masked her heart with hate...!!!
He masked his heart with anger...!!!!
do leav ur comments guys..... means a lot to me....
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